Aragorn finally confessed to Elrond that he was an alcoholic.
Malaysian Corporate Structure
Got this Powerpoint presentation in my mail a few days ago.
The Race
The funny thing about the Powerpoint presentation is that it's very true in a very parody and sarcastic way about the corporate structures in a Malaysian company. This way of company restructuring is very common in most GLC (Government Link Companies) where it favors the top management than the working class workers.
The Powerpoint presentation might be funny, but it shows a problem in the social working structure in Malaysian companies. If something is not rectified in the near future, not only will the working class lose out it the country’s financial profits, but it will cause problems in the increase profitability and productivity of the company in a long run.
Added a new friend
Just added Funky Deco's blog to my friends list. And to Funky, please don't link my counter to your page. I need to see the trafic flow.
Email Post to a Friend
I just added this new feature on the blog. It's called "Email Post to a Friend" or something like that. Basically, you can you can e-mail a post from this blog to a friend. It's a nifty feature when you need to spread the words of joy to others.
Does Mahathir Loves Anwar?
mahathir
LOVES
anwar | 00000
0000
000
00
| | Love Level: 00% |
From Go-Quiz.com
I guess not.
I have a fan outside of Malaysia
I got a comment from a Mr. Mark Kilmer on the "What the hell are they doing?" segment. It goes some like this:-
It looks to me like they're giving birth to an alien life form.
Mr. Hozair, I happened upon your blog last weekend and becoming a big fan.
Keep cool in Malaysia!
To Mr. Kilmer,
As a fan, I don't know if I should say thank you or feel sorry for you. I didn't expect people to actually read the rubbish I post here. Anyways, if you like this blog, feel free to tell your friends and family about it. And please feel free to visit my sponsors so they can give me money. Malaysian currency with the US Dollar is about 1 USD = 3.8 Ringgit Malaysia. So if I get USD 2, I'll get 7.6 Ringgit Malaysia which I can spend on my Big Mac Value Meal. Yummy......
I would like to apologize to non Malaysian readers as from time to time, I will be using some local language such as the Malay Language and a bit of Chinese. I will try to cater for the foreign readers by giving Malay Language lessons from time to time.
As I have said before, this blog will unite all races and nation. I have made first contact. Soon, the whole world will be reading my blog. Muahahahhaha (evil laugh)
p/s to Mr Kilmer, your webpage http://www.rightsided.net/ seems to be dead. I can't enter.
What the hell are they doing?
Meet Ms Shark and Mr Yo (names have been changed to protect the innocent)
Question #1
What are they doing?
a) They're doing a new mating ritual.
b) It's a new kind of foreplay.
c) What the hell are they doing?
Question #2
What is that light thinggy?
a) Someone is pointing a torchlight at their torso.
b) It's the flash from the camera.
c) WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY DOING?
Question #3
Do you still wanna know what they're doing?
a) Yes
b) No
c) I don't wanna know.
Corporate Sponsorship
I just added a few things to my layout. Firstly, I’m getting corporate sponsorship. That’s right, I’m getting “paid” for my blog. On the left hand side, below the side bar is a sponsor banner. Just click on the product that you like. It’s for a good course, namely giving me money. My target for September is to get paid about USD 2.50 from this blog. Remember, to give me money, you must click on the banner on the left hand side.
Other than the sponsorship banner, I added a search engine to search through my blog. I got the search engine from the nice guys at Google. Go Google! Some how the search engine gives me some stupid results at times. Weird. Not sure what’s the problem.
Remember to click on my sponsors.
http://hozair.blogspot.com's readers' stats
Here's the statistics of readers who come to my blog which I got yesterday. An average of 15 readers a day. Hmmmm..... You know what this means. You people aren't spreading the words of "love" to your friends. Tell them about how fantastic this blog is and how it can change their lives. There's 25 million people in Malaysia. If I can get 1% of Malaysians or 250,000 Malaysians, to read this blog then it'll be fantastic!
Social Justice
Last week I was watching TV3’s Buletin Utama. In the business segment, they were declaring the corporate salary for a few directors. Genting Berhad’s Tan Sri Lim Kok Thay has a monthly salary of RM16.5 million. Berjaya Group Berhad’s Tan Sri Vincent Tan has a monthly salary of RM 5.4 million. The first thing that goes through my mind is, “What the hell are they gonna do with that much money?” I was pretty cool with what I saw.
But yesterday’s news really pissed me off. There were 2 families with young kids who needed money for some operation. One of them needed RM 50,000 and the other needed RM 300,000. It was a very emotional segment. Their mother were crying or trying not to cry while their fathers were “begging” on national TV for people to donate money to help their kids.
The first thing that came across my mind was, “How much is Lim Kok Thay and Vincent Tan giving?” RM300,000 is NOTHING when compared to RM 16,500,000. RM 300,000 is only 1.81% of RM 16.5 million. 1.81% IS NOTHING!
Instead of asking money from these people, the poor and unfortunate families have to beg for money from people who earn peanuts, namely the working class society. Lets say that an average office worker gets about RM3,000 per month. 1.8% is only RM 54. Not to sound selfish or cruel but why ask money these classes of people. Working class citizens will have to pay monthly mortgage of their house for the next 25 years. Pay their car loans for the next 7 years. Why burden the working class citizens with more problems by portraying the misery of others on television.
This is not the case for the capitalist class and the ‘elite’ classes, where money is considered nearly unlimited. Since the amount of capital that they have is so much, unproductive spending will happen which includes buying expensive commodities that serve no productive or social value. For example, the purchases of the entire top of the line Mercedes Benz. For sure, 1 individual will not able to maximize the usage of 10 Mercedes in his garage. This kind of thinking is contributed by the “consumer based economy” where it is made to maximize one’s needs with one’s means and NOT maximizing one’s resources for the benefit of society.
This year, Malaysians will celebrate their 47th year of independence or “Merdeka”. Yet, social justice is at a very low level. We have a long way to go for better and perfect Malaysia. As quoted by Elie Weisel, “I swore never to be silent whenever human beings endure suffering and humiliation. We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented.”
BBQ in Penang
Last night, some kind of weird BBQ took place in some beach in Penang. Initially I was invited, but unfortunately the invitation came a bit too late. Too late? Well its more like "not telling in advance so that I can plan my trip to Penang" kind of late. To travel to Penang and KL isn't like travelling from Subang Jaya to Genting.
Penang to KL would require at least 3 1/2 hours on the road if one would to drive and more or less about 5 hours if one would to take the bus. This idiot Shen wants to make a "Suprise BBQ" in the last minute to someone who works and stays 350 km away from the BBQ area. To just to eat meat? Ingat aku tadak kerja lain ka?
Firstly I would drive my sorry ass back to Penang. Once there, to eat badly burned meat either from animal fat or unwanted parts of poultry or cows. After a lousy meal, drive my sorry ass back to KL again. Gee.... Thats sounds so productive and fun.
If there were only some kind of incentive or motivational event or agenda that can drive my inner self to be willing to actually take the time to drive to and back Penang.... then it'll be fun. Since there wasn't, I'll better spend my time watching Edisi Siasat.
Sorry, wrong number
Since the day that Telekom install a wrong number for my new phone, I kept getting calls from the 'unknown' who wants to talk to another 'unknown'. Examples are:
Call #1
Me: Hello
Caller: Woiii (Chinese slang), Ah Yen aaa....
Me: Terribly sorry, but I think you have the wrong number.
Caller: *tut* *tut* *tut* (hang up)
Call #2
Me: Hello
Caller: Hello. Ah Yen aaa....
Me: Sorrylah. Ini salah .......
Caller: *tut* *tut* *tut* (hang up)
Me: ????????
Call #3
Me: Hello
Caller: .....................(pauses for a second then .........) *tut* *tut* *tut* (hang up)
Me: %#*@!!!!!!!
Call#4
Knowing that the caller wanna talk to Ah Yen again
Me: AH YEN SUDAH MAMPUS!!!!!!!!!
Caller: .....................(pauses for a second then .........) *tut* *tut* *tut* (hang up)
Moral of the story, if you KNOW that you called the wrong number, just say sorry to the person who picked up the phone. Don't just hang up and piss that person off.
Now I'm Mother Teresa?
Having done the "Leader Test" earlier and was profiled as "Hitler", I did the test again. But previously I was answering 45 questions. Now, I only answered 9 questions and I got Mother Teresa. Mother Teresa and Adolf Hitler are like 2 worlds apart. Is either this dumb ass online personality test's calculation is totally screwed up or I actually have a split personality i.e. Dr Jackle and Mr Hyde..... Hmmmm...... I hope it's the earlier. I wouldn't want to be helping an old lady cross the street when my evil side wants to push her towards a speeding truck.
Leader test
Man, this online personality test sux! I'm no Hitler.
Guestbook
Ok people, I just added a guestbook and a "pass it on" to this blog. Do leave a message if you love or hate this blog. Constructive criticism is always welcomed.
Cheers!!
MOTOROLA NEW CAMERA PHONE - ZV101 ( 1.5MEGA PIXAL )
I, Robot Miniquiz
I, Robot Miniquiz presented by Beng & Ozee's Goof Off During Work
Sponsored by id Software Inc.
1. Why did the NS bots gather near the run-down bridge at the edge of the city?
a) The bots were sent there for storage
b) The bots were there for an illegal gathering for a 'ceramah'
c) It was an NS (National Service) Training Camp
2. What does US Robotics produce?
a) Robots to assist humans in daily tasks
b) Presidential candidates like Bush
c) High-end modems which subsequently were taken over by 3Com
3. Why does Will Smith hate robots in the movie?
a) Because of a past incident involving an accident which he survived
b) Because he ran out of drug lords and aliens to hate
c) Cause 'Sonny' has more personality than Will Smith can ever have in a movie
4. What is the most useful bot in the movie?
a) Sonny, the unique NS.5 bot
b) The 'Peragut Dompet' bot in the beginning
c) The bot that calculates Will Smith's box office earnings
5. Who came up with the title I, Robot
a) Isaac Asimov.
b) Will Smith
c) Some idiot with the English comprehension of a 4th grader.
6. The movie I, Robot, was filled by product sponsorship. Which brand would never be given the chance to appear in any movie because their products sucks?
a) Adidas
b) Tiger Beer
3) Proton
7. Why did Dr. Alfred Lanning jump out of the window?
a) It was the only way that he can warn everyone in the world that the robots are capable to destroy humanity.
b) He was fed-up being a capitalist slave in a multi billion company which had the same name as a modem maker.
c) He was listening to much of R Kelly's "I Believe I Can Fly"
8. What was the purpose of the three laws?
a) So that robots can never hurt a human being and at the same time protect > them.
b) Increase the number of capitalist slaves that includes lower class and non home owner middle class citizens.
c) So we can have cleaner and better smelling workers at mamak stalls. The current workers looks and smell like a donkey's butt.
9. Which was not in the Three Laws?
a) A robot may not injure a human being, or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
b) To "terminate" all humans and to prevent the birth of John Cornor.
c) To irritate everyone with his babbling and boring speeches while befriending a midget bot who speak only *beep* *beep* all in the name of the republic and the rebels.
10. What book did Dr. Lanning leave to lead Will Smith to the conspiracy?
a) 'Hansel & Gretel'
b) 'I, Robot' - Issac Asimov
c) 'My Story' - Bill Clinton
11. Why did the NS.5s impose curfew on the humans?
a) The robots wanted to prevent humans from further harm
b) The robots wanted to take revenge because the Aibo dog from Sony was discontinued
c) The robots heard of the snatch thefts and robberies in KL
12. What was the name given to the robot with emotions but lacks social skills?
a) Sonny
b) Honey
c) William Hung
13. How could a lowly paid detective drive a new Audi Convertible Prototype?
a) Due to the robot revolution, car manufacturing was automated and made much cheaper
b) It's actually a Proton; Will Smith just stuck an Audi sticker on the front
c) He was a snatch thief too
14. What happen if you broke the curfew.
a) The robots will beat the crap out of the humans.
b) The robots will sue those who break the curfew.
c) Masuk ISA.
15. What did Will Smith believe but everyone else didn't?
a) That robots are capable of hurting a human being.
b) That Will Smith once fought against aliens and mafias.
c) That Pak Lah will actually end corruption at all levels within the goverment.
16. What did Will Smith find in the robot manufacturing factory?
a) NS-5 robots which are ready for distribution.
b) Illegal assembly.
c) Perhimpunan UMNO.
17. What was the bridge that the robots were sent to?
a) Golden Gate Bridge
b) Penang Bridge
c) MRR2
Bloody Minister
Had to go to JW Marriot today to receive a certificate for a course I joined a few months ago. The program was suppose to begin at 2 and ends at 4. But did it begin at 2? Noooooooo.
All because the guest of honor, Dato XXX, Minister of XXX could not make it at 2. I predicted that the damn thing would start late, so I happily went to the Bukit Bintang to get a couple of Monorail tickets, got myself a hotdog at 1905, check out the CDs at Sungai Wang. Came back at 3 and the damn fool haven’t reach yet. WTF? Came only at about 3:10.
The damn thing later ended at 4. WTF? Where’s my cert? I was later told by the organizer that they cancelled that part of the agenda because the minister was rushing for something else.
WTF? What a waste of my time. If I knew this would happen, I would be at Midvalley watching Spider-man 2 again.
The Streamyx story
I got a call on Friday by the guys at TM Net and asking me to make an appoinment to come to my house to install Streamyx on Saturday. I was supprise that they called. I was told horrible stories by people about their services before. After registering, TM Net would come only after a month and they'll just come without setting up an appointment. If no one was at home they'll just leave a note saying that they came and no one was at home. And I only registered Streamyx together with my new phone line a week before. Having this new revelation, I wanted to write fantastic comments about Telekom in my blog. Unfortunately......
This was the coversation I had:
Dude: Apa number you pakai kat sini?
Me : 5638 xxxx
Dude: Dalam paper saya 5631 xxxx.
Me : Ehhh... Macam mana boleh macam tu. Masa saya register number ni sekali ngan Streamyx. Orang kat Kedai Telekom yang tulis number ni. Tengok. Ni yang dia printkan. Number baru saya.
Dude : Ni dia tulis 5631 xxx.
Me : Ehhh.... Celaka punya wireman. Dia dah datang pasang number salah untuk akulah. Tak guna betul.
So end of the story, the idiots who came to set up my phone line, messed up the number. They gave me some poor souls number instead of the one that the're suppose to give. Damn idiots. I thought that I wanted to say something nice about Telekom but as usual, they will one way or another fuck up the situation. Thank you Telekom for the excellent service.
Kepong Bridge is falling down
In years to come, our children may be singing this nursery rhyme in the tadikas...
Kepong Bridge is falling down,
Falling down, falling down.
Kepong Bridge is falling down,
My fair Samy.
Take a gag and shut us up,
Shut us up, shut us up.
Take a gag and shut us up,
My fair Samy.
How will we build it up,
Build it up, build it up?
How will we build it up again,
My fair Samy?
Build it up with tax and toll,
Tax and toll, tax and toll.
Build it up with tax and toll,
My fair Samy.
Roads and bridges bend and break,
Bend and break, bend and break.
Roads and bridges bend and break,
My fair Samy.
Blame it on an Act of God,
Act of God, Act of God.
Blame it on an Act of God,
My fair Samy.
Rocks and blames will wash away,
Wash away, wash away.
Rocks and blames will wash away,
My fair Samy.
Office Spam
Through the advancement of technology and communication comes e-mail, a fast yet easy to use communication to send message from 1 party to another from across the globe. And through abuse of the e-mail technology comes a new age of terror called “Office Spam” or what I like to call it, “Stupid idiots sending 1 liners to my office mail instead of working”.
The usual suspects are Wei Lin the ass, Lay Tiong the dick and Eu-Jeen the faggot. Coming to work at 8:30 am and to discover 45 unread mails or coming back after a meeting and to discover 75 unread mails from you idiots isn’t funny. Other e-mail spam convicts includes Austin who have the tendency to mail 2 identical mails (idiot, check your Outlook setting) and Ghee Beng who tend to send 3 MB size picture of a gay philophile college of his without compressing the bloody file itself.
Screw you guys.
An example of the bloody spam I get at the office
Happy Birthday Shar
Happy Birthday to Sharlene Sharmini Tee. Sorry if your name is spelt wrongly.
Samy: Repair works will stop if ACA holds probe
Samy: Repair works will stop if ACA holds probe
Samy oooohhhh Samy. I have never heard such arrogant comment on national televisyen before. “Anyone who would like to investigate can come forward, our doors are always open. They can come take the documents and after that, we will just stop all the repair works,” he said.
That is like the most uneducated statement I have ever heard. It sounds more like a threat than a cooperation. What does an investigation got to do with the repairs of the road. People have the right to know what the hell the Road Works Ministry is doing.
The thing that I don't understand is; the ministry uses the taxpayers money to construct all those highways. Instead of the taxpayers using these highway freely, we have to pay to use them. It's like when we buy a car, but to use the car, we have to rent it. ????? Or, we buy a house and to use the house we have to pay the rent. ????? Whqt logic is this???
Ok, let's give this bold bastard the benefit of the doubt, that they have to collect tolls for the maintainance of the fucking roads. Why the hell they give the rights to collect tolls to some private concession? How come the goverment can't collect the toll fee and then use it to maintain the road and the extra money, use it for other development for the people or should I say, the taxpayers. Instead, collection of the toll money is being distributed towards the board of directors of these money hungry toll collector where they can't contribute much to the people of Malaysia other than pay their 30% corporate tax.
Samy Vellu said the RM20mil recommended by his ministry to the Cabinet for repair works on the flyover was based on an analysis by the Public Works Department. This is the best. After collecting so much money, can't the concessionary repair the god damn road them self. Isn't the "SO CALLED" toll collection is suppose to maintain the condition of the road. Instead, they are using the taxpayers money to repair it.
http://www.jeffooi.com/archives/2004/08/mrr2_the_samy_v.php
To sum up
- We have pay to have roads/highways built.
- We have to pay to use the roads/highways that was built with our money.
- When repairs are done towards the roads/highways our money is used and not the collected money.
Samy, your two best friends have relinquish their position in politics. I think it's about time you did the same also. Here's the lyric of Hang Mokhtar's Ayo-yo Sami (1987)
Ayo-yo Samy, Ayo-yo Samy
Sekarang orang ada susah hati
Tol di sane, tol di sini
Di Penang orang suka naik feri
Ayo-yo Samy, Ayo-yo Samy
Tak boleh kasi tol kurang lagi
Hari-hari bayar tol lagi
Nanti saya habis duit gaji
The Idiots at Hitz.FM
Listening to Hitz.fm today while I was driving to work. This weekend, Hoobastank is performing in KL. I think it's in Berjaya Time Square. If I'm not mistaken.
So, what these two morning crew idiots (Jay Jay and Rudy) did was to try to contact a member of Hoobastank. It doesn't matter who, just as long they could talk to one of the band members.
What they did in their quest was making prank calls to a few agencies such as MAS and the Berjaya Time Square management. The best part about the Berjaya scene was that Rudy pretended to be Hoobastank's manager, Mr. Brown. He he actually convinced the management that he was Mr Brown and got the waiting number for Hoobastank. Wah. Those guys are championslah.
A few weeks back, they tried to contack George Lucas after the conformation of the Episode 3 title. The called everyone at Lucas studios. Finally they got hold of Lucas's secretary at the person talking to her pretended to be Arnold Swazengger. Or how ever you spell it. Anyway, the receptionist knew it was a prank call and hung up.
The morning crew are a bunch of idiots or should I say, the Champion of Retards. The should be shot within sight for airing prank calls on national radio. For their act of stupidity, I give them 2 thumbs up. Keep up the good work. Don't be any smarter.
HITZ.FM BEST LAH!
Diari Pemantau Media Malaysia
Malaysian Media Monitors' Diary: When API comes under OSA
Diari Pemantau Media Malaysia
Malaysian Media Monitors' Diary: When API comes under OSA : "the minister is suggesting that we all hold hands "
I wonder, is money more important than our lifes? What happen to the spirit of a "Caring Society". And these are the dickheads that we elect to lead us for a better future.
We always hear that, "Our life is not worth a million dollars". But in this case, "Foreign investment is worth more than our lifes". Kudos to the best government in the world.
Love to be a Malaysian.
Man caught having sex in car dies after being stabbed
Man caught having sex in car dies after being stabbed
This N. Govindaraj dude is a real dickhead. The usual law of friendship states that, "You shouldn't date your friends' girlfriend". This guy is even better by moving up a notch. What he did was:-
- Have sex with someone's wife.
- Have sex with a FRIENDS's wife.
- Have sex with a NEIGHBOURS's wife.
I mean, please man. Have some honour. There are things in this world that you can do. There are others you shouldn't do, even if your the worst mafia or traid leader in an area. Never ever sleep with someone elses wife even worst if that someone is your friend/neighbour/workmate. This idiot is truely a classical idiot. It's like a member of Al-Qaeda walking around the Big Apple telling everyone that he wants' to blow up some commercial building within the next few weeks. Or like some fool wearing all florecent clothings in the night and at the same time, trying to hide from the cops. It's like waiting for trouble to come to him. Tak ada kerja lain ka?
| H | Hardworking | | O | Organic | | Z | Zonked | | A | Awesome | | I | Irresistible | | R | Rounded |
Name Acronym GeneratorFrom Go-Quiz.com
How to SMS
Using mobile phones for communications is being a part of our culture. In countries like Japan, mobile phones users have exceeded the fixed line users. Other Asian countries are also following Japan in the mobile communication trend.
One thing about mobile phones compared to fixed lines is that you have a lot more facilities other that the normal voice communication. The most popular type of facility is the SMS (Short Messaging System).
I am one of the few people on earth who doesn't like to use the SMS language. I like to type the words in full. SMS language? Those that sound like,
"Wht up wit dat?"
"u c me 2 meet be4 skool begin"
Those SMS are still ok in my book, even though at times it kinda makes me wanna take a whole box of panadol and shove it to the senders throat for making me trying to decrypt those words. But those are nothing compare to a friend of mine. Her SMSes are the best. I mean, she should be a programmer for the Enigma Codes or some of those high security military decoding algorithms. The SMS sounds something like this.
SkrgIDktNkSmpiRmhU.KlurCptTkNkTnguLmKtDlmKrtNiPslMls.
CptNtTgglMv.KtSnwKn.MdVllyJhSgt. More or less like that. That SMS above is in Bahasa Melayu, so don't bother trying to decipher it in English. Even in BM, I'm always trying so hard not to let my head explode from trying to understand the SMS or the least, let my brains drip out from my ear. AAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaa the pain!!!
Grandpa
Went to Carrefour yesterday for my weekly shopping ritual. While I was there, I saw a grand dad who was about 70 playing with his grand son who was about 10. For a more detailed visualization, the grand son was chasing grand dad around the trolley (main kejar-kejar). Like when I was a kid, I used to chase my friends around chairs, tables, cars or just about anything. I was actually surprise to see the grand dad playing with the grand son like...... A little kid. It was a very sweet scene to look at. Two different generations of people, socially having fun together with out the insecure comments of others when they look at those two. Actually, to think of it, I never ever seen a grand dad playing kejar-kejar with their grand kids.
They stop chasing each other when grand ma came. Grand ma must have said something like, "Act like someone your own age, and you..... Act like your an adult". That was very cute, seeing both of them getting a scolding from grand ma. Both of them must be in trouble.
Looking at those two reminded of my late grand dad. He passed away when I was only 5 or 6. I can't remember much about him. I do remember that he never hit me or scolded me before. Unlike my grand ma who usually beat the crap out of me.
I only remember us going to the Singapore or Johore Zoo. I also remember going to a shopping mall with him and later getting lost. It's sad that I can't remember much about him even though he was a great guy. God bless his soul.
Spider-man miniquiz
Spider-man Miniquiz, brought to you by Beng & Ozee's Lunch Break Special
Sponsored by Power Root Tongkat
1. Who is Spider-man's latest villian?
a) Doc Ock
b) Green Goblin
c) Pegawai Hasil Dalam Negeri
2. What powers did Spider-man have?
a) Webs coming out from his hands.
b) Spider sense.
c) Able to wear skin tight suit and still look sexy.
3. What was embendded at the back of Otto Octavious?
a) Tenticles
b) Mechanical Arms
c) A very expensive back pack.
4. Doc Ock wants _________
a) To make a new power source.
b) To kill Spider-man
c) Figure out how to take a shower with those arms at the back of him.
5. What question did Peter Parker ask himself to keep his secret identity in check?
a) Who am I?
b) What am I?
c) What the f&@k am I doing swinging around New York in red and blue tights while I should be getting a real job?
6. What is Dr. Otto Octavious' research regarded as in the scientific circle?
a) A project in a reliable fusion power source
b) A total waste of semi-government funding through an unfair tender process
c) A project in ridiculously expensive retractable clothes hangers
7. Who does Spider-Man fear the most?
a) The Green Goblin
b) Doctor Octopus
c) His Moldavian landlord
8. Complete this sentence in the movie: "I am Spider-Man, _______ ."
a) No more
b) Some more
c) You whore
9. What happen to Doc Ock's goofy, retarded, nerdy hair cut like in the comics?
a) Doc Ock now has a hair stylist.
b) It's a USD 200m budget movie, the least they could do is invest more money for his hair.
c) Sam Raimi is having that hair style.
10. The Green Goblin will most probably come back as the villain in the next sequel. Who will be his partner to fight Spider-man?
a) Green Goblin and the Lizard
b) Green Goblin and Hobgoblin
c) Green Goblin and Peter's Moldavian landlord.
11. When Spider-man saved the people in the subway train thus revealing his identity, those saved said :-
a) He couldn't even be older than my kid.
b) Why the f*** is this kid not in school. Is this kind of kid, Bush is talking about.... leading American for a better future.
c) Isn't that the creepy kid from Pleasantville?
12. Why was Doc Ock pissed?
a) He couldn't make is fusion reactor work the way he wanted.
b) A collage kid was smarter than he was at predicting the failure of the fusion reactor.
c) He couldn't get tickets for the opening of Spider-man 2.
13. What couldn't Spider-man do?
a) Stop a speeding train by using his legs. Superman can.
b) Get a girlfriend even if the chick likes him. My office boy could do it even if the chick doesn't like him.
c) Deliver pizza in time. My grandmother can send pizzas in time.
14. Why did Spider-man loose his powers?
a) He had personal issues that made him mentally unfit to use his spider like ability.
b) He was exposed to kryptonite.
c) He needs to get laid.
15. Why did Aunt May claim, "There's a hero in all of us..."?
a) She knows Peter's true identity
b) She knows Clark Kent's true identity
c) She was referring to her secret identity as 'SuperGran'
16. Why was Mary Jane upset with Peter?
a) He didn't show up for her stage play
b) He said he didn't have feelings for her
c) She wanted to go web-swinging with him too
17. Why did Peter run out of web to shoot?
a) He lost focus on his responsibilities as Spider-Man
b) His innate spider ability allows him only limited webbing
c) Give the man a break, he can only 'shoot' that much in a day.
18. Who exploits Peter Parker and pays him the lowest wage possible?
a) Jonah J. Jameson
b) The pizza delivery boss
c) Sam Raimi
19. What was the choice that Spider-man had to make?
a) The choice of being Spider-man or ordinary Peter Parker,
b) The choice of dating MJ or his landlords daughter.
c) The choice of getting paid USD 30m or USD 10m with 1% or gross earnings for the next sequel.
20. Why did Harry slap Peter?
a) Because he was drunk.
b) Because he wanted to know if Spider-man would be in between their friendship.
c) Because Sam Raimi is paying Tobey to much for doing nothing.
21. Why did Aunt May walk away with out saying anything after Peter told her what really happen to Uncle Ben?
a) She was very angry at Peter for causing Uncle Ben's death and didn't know what to say.
b) She went upstairs because she forgot to turn off the iron.
c) Actually she did scream, shout and use profanity at Peter especially calling him a "Useless F***" but since the movie is PG-13, they remove that scene.
22. Why was Dr. Connor pissed with Peter Parker?
a) His grades were slacking off.
b) His report on fusion power was due.
c) Who the f*** in the movie wasn't pissed off with Peter Parker?
Spider-man 2 review
Yes, I know. The movie has been out for the past month already. But been a bit busy and wanted to write a special and personal review on Spider-man 2 since he's been my comic book favorite since ........ secondary school I guess.
Where do I begin with the review? THE MOVIE ROCKS!!!! So far it's the best movie of this year, no doubt about that. Every review on the internet says the same. I can't disagree with them at all. Is it the best movie ever made. Well, that's a very subjective question. It's gotta be one of the best movies ever made. I mean, what other movie that has action, drama, a love story and good characters all in one movie? Which movie that you watch ever made you feel happy, sad, laugh, suspenseful and even cry. 2 thumbs up for Sam Raimi for his excellent work.
To compare Spider-man with movies such as .... Six Sense is plain wrong. I mean, Six Sense was great and all, but there not in the same category. Spider-man should be compared with other movie of it's genre which are comic-to-movie movies. Here's my top 10 to comic-to-movie movies
- Spider-man 2 (Doc Ock rocks)
- X-Men 2 (everything was excellent)
- Superman 2 (kneel before Zod)
- Batman Returns (the one with Penguin and Catwoman)
- Spider-man
- Superman
- Batman
- X-Men
- MIB
- Daredevil
Notice that I preferred the sequel of the movies compared to it prequel. Unfortunately, movies like Superman 3, Superman 4, Batman Forever and Batman and Robin are the movie ever made. They we so horrible. It puts to shame to the people at DC Comics. At least Marvel is not gonna fuck up their comic book characters in the name of profit making. (I hope....) What Sam Raimi did with Doctor Octavius (Doc Ock) was excellent. As a frequent reader to the Spider-man universe, the only time Doc Ock was portrait as a fast cunning advisory to Spider-man was in the "Ultimate Spider-man" comics. Other variations of Doc Ock were not too brutal or menacing. Sam Raimi did a good job by making Doc Ock so menacing yet at the same time having a human side. Doc Ock has gotta be one to the best villain in movie history. In my opinion, he is up there with other great movie villain such as General Zod (Superman 2), Brig. Gen. Francis X. Hummel (The Rock), Cyrus 'The Virus' Grissom (Con Air), Darth Maul (Star Wars: Phantom Menace), T-Rex (Jurassic Park), T-1000 (Terminator 2) and the best villain of all Darth Vader (Star Wars).
The Spider-man comics are filled with wonderful characters, let it be allies or villains. Here are some villains that I hope they will have in the later sequels of the Spider-man movie. I read it somewhere, that Sony is trying to push Spider-man for 4 more sequels. That'll be great for many of the Spider-man villains.
 | Venom aka Eddie Brock, have basically the same powers as Spider-man only stronger and faster. Brock got his powers from an alien symbiote that Spider-man used to wear. |  | Carnage aka Cletus Kasady, a criminal which was serving 11 consecutive life terms until he was fused with Venom's symbiote's child. Has the same powers as Venom but stronger. The symbiote itself create snares, swing line, and most often bladed weapons as a weapon. |  | Lizard aka Dr. Curtis Connors, the professor that teaches Peter at college, tries to regrow his missing hand with the help of reptile genes. The hand was successfully grown at the cost of turning him into the monster known as the Lizard. |  | Black Cat aka Felicia Hardy, was one of Spider-man's love interest at one point. Black Cat has fantastic gymnastic and fighting ability that makes her one of the best cat burgler. |  |
Sandman aka Flint Marko, has the ability to turn his body to sand and control sand. If he comes into the movie, he'll look something like the T-1000 in Terminator 2. |
Check this site out for more info on Spider-man ==> http://www.spiderfan.org
Woman freed after giving statement on naked romp
Woman freed after giving statement on naked romp: " belonged to the woman?s "
This has gotta be one of the funniest story in the papers for the past few weeks. The police might have thought that it was some kind of rape case as there were parked in the middle of no where.
The funny thing was that the chick actually drove the car a few kilometers with the motorcycle still embedded to it. What a bunch of retards. The chick's parents must be furious and damn assamed after this........ errr.... misadventure.
Indian national at Malaysia wants to find a Girlfriend
http://profiles.myspace.com/users/1139909
"hai iam hamid from india ........now i am staying malaysia.. saya sedang cari girl frend....makwe..you r one pls msg me.. "
This dude is really desperate. Please girls, please help him.
Klang Half Marathon
Last Sunday, I went for the Klang Half Marathon with a few of my friends. Supposed to start at 7am but the fucked up organizers started it after 7:30am. Everyone was kinda pissed at that moment. They even had the time to "brief" us on how many people can win the medal. Only the first 300 lucky SOB can get the medals and must reach before the 1 hour mark. Me and my bud, Gema started to shout at the organizers with out sarcastic comments.
- Woi! Cepatlah. Aku tak habis undi untuk Malaysia Idol.
- Cepatlah. Repeat Akademi Fantasia kul 11. Aku nak tengok siapa kena keluar.
- Woi! Buat apa dengar hamper lebih-lebih. Jual ka? Jual ka? Corrupt! Corrupt!
- Cepatlah. aku nak berak.
- Cepatlah. Aku datang dari Perlis ni. Nanti penat aku nak drive balik.
When we were at the Adidas booth before the race began, they were promoting they marathon run called the "King of the Road". While we were looking at the brochures at the Adidas booth regarding the run, came this dude striking a conversation with us.
Dude: Abang nak join ke run ni
Us : Rasanya nak joinlah. Apasal?
Dude: Apa ni bang. Adidas run ni 80 minit.
Us : Apasal?
Dude: Nilah. Yang bagus dan famous 80 minit untuk qualify. Yang mengarut macam ni, 60 minit. Giler mengarut. Bukan terkenal pun organizer dia.
Us : Ya ke? Betul jugak. Tak pe. Nanti kita join yang Adidas run.
Dude: Ok, bang. Good luck.
Us : Ok, Good luck.
I even saw a few familiar faces at this run. Familiar? No, not those people that I know personally but people that I've seen in other marathons. They are in no order: - Cute, small Thai chick.
- Cute, small Thai chick's father who also won the first place at the Ipoh Full Marathon.
- Cute chinese chick who runs with no shoe.
- A chick with an ass that you can flip a coin with.
- Young indian kid who should be named after Forest Gump.
At the end of the run, it was damn hillarious. We were standing near the finishing line, talking about how "fantastic" we did. Then all of a sudden this dude come over to my friend Zoul.
Dude2: Hey, congradulations (while shaking hand)
Zoul : Hey, thanks man. Congrats too.
Dude2: Damn tiredlah. Luckily we made it in time.
Zoul : Yeah. I also feel damn tired.
Dude2: Oklah. I gotta go. See you.
Zoul : Yeah. See you. When the dude left, we ask Zoul who was he? Was he his office mate or something. Zoul said no. Zoul actually wanted to say to the dude, "Who the fuck are you?". We were like, "What?". Cis we all though they knew each other. Must be a simple case of mistaken identity. But funny though. End of the day, it was hell lots of fun. I thought that I could get my revenge with the Thai dude who got 1st in the Ipoh Marathon. I wanted to go to him and tell him in his face that I wanted to beat him at this run. Just because he got 1st and I got like the 3,000th place doesn't mean I can;t beat him. All I need is a bit more training.
An eyeful a day keeps the doctor away
| How to make a hozair |
Ingredients:
5 parts intelligence
5 parts humour
3 parts instinct |
Method:
Layer ingredientes in a shot glass. Add a little cocktail umbrella and a dash of emotion |
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